Really, it is difficult for me to really express how loved, or how lucky I count myself to be surrounded by wonderful people who care for me and make sure that our family has everything that it needs. When our son was on the way it was rather hectic but I felt relatively at ease, thanks to those special people that love us. Had they not been there in our lives it would have been a drastically different story.
Alright, I know what you are saying. This is normal. You find his everywhere when somebody is expecting a child. Well, I do agree with you in so far as saying that it is the normal way of things, it is not however a given. No? Actually it can look much different if you find your circumstances lacking.
Sure we had the baby shower, actually we had a couples shower since I would never have considered doing it without my husband. Yet, that was understood; he never would have considered missing out on it. And the people who hosted it for us never thought for a moment that it would ever be any different, his participation was planned from the very beginning.
We have the good fortune of sharing the same best friends, actually we have been friends since college with them since college. But that is a story for another day. Needless to say it was clear to them when they agreed (asked) to host the shower that we would all be involved in some capacity or another. And my husband was wonderful he helped take care of all of the food (purchases) and transportation of the supplies. My best friends husband is a professional chef and (yes, his dinner parties are world class) prepared all of the food. My BFF organized it and as you can imagine they made me sit everything out. I take that back, I was able to help choose a theme, and was involved in choosing (and only really choosing) it suited me fine, and I couldn't have imagined a better shower party. It was a silly little theme that was special to me in a number of different ways. Though it also meant a lot to my husband as well, because it was something that helped us connect early in our relationship.
That was important to me. For one, it was something that both my husband and I would enjoy as well as our friends. I think when it comes to showers you need to be sure that you are happy with the idea. A lot of women that I know have had less than stellar celebrations that felt well, superficial to some extent. One of the main reasons was because they worked off of instagram rather than searching inside for what they truly anted.
At first I was hesitant to ask for it, mainly because I thought that we couldn't find the decorations and other bits and pieces needed to make it work. We actually found most of it by shopping around. As for the invites and things like RSVP and thank you notes we found it without too much trouble. We just need to make a couple of alterations that made them work.
We sort of winged it but, there are plenty of sites that you can refer to if you are having trouble getting comfortable with the idea. For example here is one of the pages that we used when getting started. The point that they made that it is common to have a male co-host was a good tip for us. It made the wording on the invitation flow better a lot better and it made the intent (at least in our opinion flow a lot better) of the whole thing a lot clearer.
Also when it comes to themes I don't really think that we ever had any question if ours would work, but that was just us. I think that you can really choose whatever you want, some even choose to host it around a BBQ, which was not idea for us. At the same time you can say that the different themes for couples baby showers are not really suited for a more standard style of girls only celebration. Here is an example of what I mean. Regardless of what you choose the idea of a co-ed celebration shouldn't be too daunting.
When it came to the shower we were of the opinion that it should be about the moment together with our friends and family that were able to come. The need for the necessities was not some much a concern for us. In fact we had already acquired most of he items that most new parents find in their possession (in one way or another) shortly after we hit the end of the first trimester.
That said it was really just a matter of preparing the nursery and the BIG one, preparing ourselves for being parents. And the afternoon that we spent with our friends helped us a lot in that respect. For one, we had such a good time, it was a positive experience that really helped us get just a little bit more accustomed with the idea of being parents. When you are expecting a child there are a thousand different things going through our minds. It is rather nebulous since there are mixed signals pulsating through your mind. If you will, let me give you an example: When I was pregnant I was extremely happy, excited, and thankful that I was going to become a mother. At the same time I was extremely nervous since the questions that go along with that implication are pretty strong. "Am I ready for this?" Yikes, the thought of it still sends a slight chill down my spin. Enough of that though… It all went alright, and the afternoon was important to help us prepare for the responsibilities of parenthood.
But those are memories for a day far off in the future somewhere.